I’m not a princess
not some damsel in distress that needs saving
you already know that
already heard the story
of how I scooped up my own broken pieces
and applied superglue
until I was mostly back together again
and about how I packed my entire life
into a single car
and drive across the country to start over
and about how I found new dreams
to replace the ones I’d watched die
you know I’m my own savior
that I’ve learned how to save myself
from the wreckage of being human
but know this too
loving you means I’ll let you be the hero
sometimes
let you slay my dragons for me
not because I really need your help
but because I trust you
to follow through with the rescue
Tag: Love / Heartbreak
obviously any poems about love, heartbreak, and relationships
you must be a reader [poem]
you must be a reader
to love me the way you do
there are things you can only learn in realities
where love is magic and magic is everywhere
words will guide you
storytellers you love will clear the path
between us
it’s easy to love a reader
references flowing back and forth between us
books trusted to one another
like previous treasures
when I hand you a poem
or point you to a favorite story of mine
I’m saying
here’s a piece of me
wrapped in pretty words and colorful imagery
trace your fingers over my heart
and memorize this sweet chapter we’ve started
part time lover [poem]
loving me is a part time position
benefits include
flexible hours
limited responsibility
and an amazingly diverse meal plan
I don’t want you around all of the time
I don’t need a keeper
or a pet
we can meet up whenever there’s a bit
of time to spare between our two busy lives
I don’t want you to fix my depression
or raise my self-esteem
I don’t need a therapist
or a live-in psychologist trying to
piece me together
our time together will buoy my spirit
like a good time should
or we wouldn’t be here right now
I love to cook
exploring the world with the tip of my tongue
I’ll invite you along if you’re game
but I don’t need you there
I can enjoy a new dish without you
this is what is means to be my part time lover
I don’t need you
to fill a full time position in my life
but you’re welcome to play a part
in my bigger picture
to the woman who would love me [poem]
sweetheart
I’m sorry in advance
for the trouble I’m going to put you through
if you find yourself at my door
love a beautiful blossom between us
then you need to know why I’m allergic
to loving a good woman like you
I grew up loving girls
a fluffy kind of love that sows friendships for a lifetime
or at least it tries to
I never really wanted another woman though
never saw myself sweaty and breathless
with that earthy kind of love
until her
for the first time
I found myself drowning in another woman’s ocean
thought I could link our hearts
a beautiful constellation
but she didn’t want my love like that
instead
she offered me the role of her friendly little whore
I just had to remember to keep my heart locked away
to leave hers alone wherever it rested
she burned me bad
obviously
left this fear of loving women in her wake
you my dear
have an uphill battle to reach my skittish heart
I can only hope you don’t give up
before you reach the top
on loving my anxious heart [poem]
I hate to say it love
but you’re going to need the patience of a saint
because loving me will suck
sometimes
my damaged pieces are all glued back together
but I’m still lost on the darker days
I still feel hollow and unworthy
sometimes
there are too many scars
I can’t ignore the way it stings
when I get too comfortable
my anxious heart
looking behind every word for a catch
treating every person as a liar
sometimes
it’s so automatic
I don’t even realize I’m doing it until
I can’t breathe for wanting reassurance
that this is real
that you’re still here
that I am lovable
sometimes
if you say it loud enough
I might even believe it
friends to lovers [poem]
when you and I meet
love
it’ll be uneventful
we’ll bond over something silly
like Marvel movies or our favorite coffee place
you won’t realize it in that moment
that I’m going to matter to you
and that’s okay
it really is
love at first sight is intense and wonderful in its own way
but I won’t want that from you
you’ll catch on
after you spend enough time around me
and my adorable weirdness
I’ll quickly become that friend you can’t really explain to others
some stories about me
will sound like Plain Jane moments
but others will make people assume you’re spinning tall tales
you’ll know from our long and winding talks that
I really did meet a guy who said he was a werewolf
and had a vampire for a friend
and danced naked around a bonfire with dozens of other witches
it just sounds a bit wild out of context
that’s all
you’ll know me page by page
love
because that’s the only way to make sense
of the odd life I’ve led
I’ll find your life just as fascinating
even if you think that living an hour from your hometown is lame
you’ll see how amazing your stories are
to someone who’s only ever had the tsunami and never the calm sea
I hope you fall in love with me slowly
seeing my scuff marks for the texture they are
rather than damage they could’ve been
you’ll love me right
I think
because you’ll get it
there won’t be anything vague in our relationship
not when you’ll be my wife’s friend too
not when you’ll know all about
the polyamory
and the past mistakes
and the reasons I will always love again
you’ll really understand me
and that’s something I look forward to the most
I can’t wait to meet you
love
the bitter truth [poem]
I won’t thank you for it
for the lesson you taught me
but I understand the part you played
you crawled into my life
drenched in self-loathing and stale beer
grief heavy on your heart
you were looking for light in the darkness
and I played your lighthouse
shining your way out of that lonely place
you had a hard time believing that I could love you
but I’m patient
I waited you out
hands open in offering
you accepted that I might be telling the truth
and we both smiled
it was beautiful
as many venomous creatures are beautiful
all bright color and deadly speed
we fell in love
wrapped ourselves in its familiar grace
and healed
or at least you did
in the years between us
I’m not sure where we lost it
where the love died
there was no flash
no angry fire
no sudden emptiness
that would’ve been a blessing I think
instead there was a slow decay
I tried to feed your happiness
to give you all my love
wide open and warm
you went out to the bar
spent every weekend with your friends
whispering doubts about us
I slept alone
clueless
until the night you told me it was over
that your depression came from being tied to me
tied down to a future you didn’t want
there was no discussion
you were done
so we were done
I let you go
because what else could I do
in the face of all your
certainty
I held myself together with iron threads of
willpower and wishes
discovering an unfamiliar strength in my own wreckage
I learned where my lines are drawn
found the dreams I could grant myself
and made them happen
you were cruel and careless and unkind
so I will never thank you
but I’m not sure I’d know what I want from this life
without your betrayal to open my eyes
and that’s the bitter truth
anchor [poem]
it’s in your eyes the first time we meet
this frightened hopelessness
that comes from too much running
too much fighting
too much feeling
I get it
love
I know how it feels
to become rudderless in the middle of the ocean
every wave reminding you of
just how out of control your life has become
how powerless you are
to correct your own course
I get it
love
I know how your throat locks up
with all the words you want to say
how you can’t even cry
so you watch people walk by and
wish you could ask for help
something
anything
please
I get it
love
I know how to anchor you safely
if you need to stay out here to lose yourself
or how to find you and pull you back to shore
before the storms can sweep you away
I’ll save you from drowning in yourself
if you let me
love
if you let me
I’ll love you until you remember
how to love yourself again
still [poem]
I don’t know who I am
when I’m not loving someone
when my mind doesn’t have that
special person
tucked away on a back burner
simmering
into my thoughts when I least expect it
I’ve always had someone to love
someone to turn my heart toward in the quiet of 2am
I don’t know how to not be in love
how to be free of the
now love and the
I wish love and the
what could’ve been would’ve burned
brighter than the sun
love
I feel so empty
a lost speck of dust
in the infinite expanse of this universe
and I just
I don’t know who I am
without the act of loving someone
I don’t know how to be this kind of free
love is an active thing and yet
I’m just standing here
still
forget me [poem]
midnight arrives
and I find myself lost in the quiet
you’re missing
and I want you to forget me
the way you forget my questions
dancing around the answers
never lying
but
never open
I don’t know what the hell this is
who you are this time
I want to believe in you
so badly
my heart crumbles bit by bit
at the thought that maybe
you never changed
maybe I’m just
wrong
his secret [poem]
don’t let him trick you
make you his dirty little secret
like that’s some kind of blessing
like it makes you special
you’re better than this honey
worth more than his
candy coated compliments
and fickle fantasies
toxic love [poem]
I need to run
to get so far out of reach
you never find me
(not that you’re looking)
I need to light our bridge on fire
and watch it burn
make sure it’s unusable
for future mistakes
because I clearly can’t resist
crossing back
to retrace my own tracks
I need to escape this
residual heartache
your presence leaves on my heart
need to wash away the stench
of your hollow words
and honeyed lies
I need to get away from this
toxic love
glass jar [poem]
the last person who left me
said I wasn’t good enough to be their
whore
hollowed me out
until I became a glass jar
to hold their spare thoughts and loose change
on a neglected shelf
forgotten
as the next person finds me I know
I’ll be covered in grime
the years unkind to replaceable things
like me
they’ll have to hold my fragile trust
between their palms
and hope I learn to believe in second chances
or in new beginnings
for recycled hearts
Larissa Lee 