Posted in [poetry]

Sick and Tired of Poetry [poem]

If I could redo yesterday
I’d do it all the same
only I’d make sure that you knew
you were the one to blame
I don’t want you to get over me
I don’t wanna be your test
I don’t want another lecture
from somebody who “knows best”
I’m not trying for forever
or even for a year
I just want someone there
to stem the flow of tears
I’m sick of all my free time
and sick of poor, lonely me
I’m tired of all this madness
sick and tired of poetry

Posted in [poetry]

Pillows, Tears, and Dread [poem]

I’d have to say I’m scared
I’m scared cuz I don’t know
I don’t know what will happen
what will happen when I go
when I go to lay down
to lay down in my bed
in my bed that’s full of pillows
full of pillows, tears, and dread
tears and dread I feel each evening
each evening trying to sleep
trying to sleep away my pain
my pain that runs soul deep

Posted in [poetry], [writer stuff]

Poetic Musings

I’ve been rereading my own book in order to get some ideas of what I want to do, say, and show during my upcoming workshop. And I have to say, it’s definitely an interesting experience.

Keep in mind that these poems were ripped from my heart. For most of the poems I chose to publish in “Dark-Hearted”, I couldn’t NOT write them out. Think of the most painful, persistent heartburn you’ve ever had… and then imagine the relief your antacid (or whatever cure you use) gives you. That’s how the poems were for me; holding them in hurt so bad it was hard to breathe, but writing them out made the pain subside, at least partly.

Another quirk of rereading my own poetry is thinking of the inspirations. My poetry is organized on my computer in a very specific way: title, date, why it was written, complete poem. I like having a record of everything that made the poems come out. But in “Dark-Hearted”, I selected poems that fit the theme and then organized them by their emotions (anger, sorrow, etc.). I wanted the poems to flow, and I succeeded… but for me, as I read, they’re out of chronological order.

My final poetic musing is that I published less than 25% of the poems I’ve written so far. I’m now trying to decide if I want to publish a second collection, including all of my lighter-themed poetry (and corny middle-school stuff). It’d have to be more autobiographical, in order for some of the poetry to make any sense. And that’s a whole new can of worms.

Posted in [business projects], [poetry]

Success at Hastings!

My signing at Hastings here in Killeen was a huge success! While the average book signing at our small store sells only 1-3 copies of their book, I managed to sell 5.

That’s on top of the 5-6 I’ve sold prior to the signing. And the Amazon orders, which are even better. It’s just amazing to know that strangers are purchasing my book; I guess it’s just now starting to sink in.

I hope that one day I make it really big, look back at my posts here, and smile. ^_^

Posted in [business projects], [poetry]

Barnes & Noble bust

Barnes & Noble can’t carry my book in the store, unfortunately. Because of the way they would have to order the books, they have to have them prepaid for. In other words, in order for me to do a book signing, the people who wanted books would have to pay for them ahead of time, come pick them up, and then get them signed.

Hastings can carry my book in store, and they are currently in Killeen. I’ll be arranging my first book signing ASAP, most likely mid-May. I’m hoping for May 16th, but I’ll post the official date when available.

I’m also going to get ahold of Borders Express here in the Killeen Mall. I believe they use the same book source as Hastings, so they should (ideally) be able to carry my book as well.

Posted in [business projects], [poetry]

Sending out feelers

I’m working on “sending out feelers”… that is, on getting the various local bookstores and what have you to carry my books. We’ll see how convincing I am as time goes by.

I’m also looking into contacting other stores in two ways. One is via email, for some bookstores in my “hometown” (as close as I have to one, at least). I think I can convince some of them to carry a “local” author, even though I don’t live there anymore. If anything, my relatives in the area may be able to build some hype for me. The second way I’m going to attempt to contact stores is through my wonderful network of friends. If they ask their local branches to carry my book for them and other friends, it’ll be available to more people.

The biggest road block is that I still haven’t discovered whether my book is “returnable”. It’s a process in which a bookstore can return unsold books down the road and get a refund. Bookstores tend to shy away from non-returnable books. So we’ll see where mine stands tomorrow. Wish me luck!

Posted in [poetry]

Books ordered for Hastings (Killeen)

Copies of “Dark-Hearted” are on the way to Hastings as we speak!

We’ve only ordered ten to start off, so I’m not scheduling a book signing just yet. Between coworkers, myself, and friends locally… I’m not sure there will be more than a couple books left for a signing in the first place. We’ll see.

As soon as I finally DO manage to schedule a signing, though, it’ll be exciting!

Posted in [poetry]

Depression [poem]

a weight on the heart.
felt by so few, yet so many.
a feeling unworthy of a name.
going unnoticed until it’s gone.
the spirit yelling to the mind.
the mind finding bliss in ignorance.
anger and sadness playing a game.
the unbeatable beatable foe.
an enemy often unseen.
it comes when destruction occurs.
it’s gone before the dust settles.
who cares about who cares?
a person’s best worst friend.
be prepared, you’ll meet again.

Posted in [poetry]

How Dare You? [poem]

How dare you leave me here in this God-forsaken place?
What’s home without a mother?
It’s just an empty space.
How dare you leave me here in this empty, sinking pit?
What’s life living without you?
It’s just a piece of shit.
How dare you leave me here without my only friend?
How can things just move on?
I wish my life could end.
How dare you leave me here, lost in a world so wild?
How could you do this to me?
Inside, I’m still a child.
Come back.