she never really got it
the way you felt when she smiled in your direction
or the way her voice made your stomach flip every time
she saw you as temporary
a fun game to play in the summer heat
before life got serious again
you mooned over her
a sad puppy trailing after her in hopes of gaining
one more tummy rub
one more round of fetch
but she never was a dog person
or maybe
maybe she just never wanted a pet
someone so dependent on her for affection
you can’t blame a free spirit for her untamed ways
or her inability to handle commitments she never asked for
let’s be honest
you knew her wild heart
long before you yearned to hold it as your own
Tag: Love / Heartbreak
obviously any poems about love, heartbreak, and relationships
fine print [poem]
write me a poem
let me read each breath between the lines
your pulse the rhythm followed
as your words twist around my heart
and wow
this is different
poets don’t often get poetry
lovers too intimidated to try sharing in the opening up
the baring of bones too intimate
but you
brave soul
you scribble your soul in permanent ink
and dare me to decipher the marks
to read the fine print
unintelligible I love yous and forget-me-nots
and your heart keeps beating
poetry
a friend with benefits [poem]
I remember you without any resentment
our interlude
a reminder that this body is
and always was
my body
to do with as I wished
and so I did
with you
I learned that I liked this body
that it liked your body
that our bodies worked well
together
if not perfect
you gave me back the keys to my own car
and told me to drive
your guidance
imperfect and unromantic
but
better than the disregard of those who came before
so thank you
for being my beneficial friend
for enjoying this body
and showing me how to do the same
mosaic heart [poem]
the definition of insanity is
doing the same thing
again
and again
and again
and expecting a new result
I throw myself against this life
spun-glass meeting concrete
and marvel
at the shattering of my heart
into the tiny pieces
before I pick them up and
put myself back together
to try again
the definition of stubbornness is
the insistent need to do the same thing
again
and again
and again
until a new result happens
I am constantly
making and unmaking myself
against life’s hard edges
without pausing to reconsider my course
always pushing and pulling
and living each moment in awe
of my own
deconstructed
mosaic
heart
melodramatic muse [poem]
I’m sick of writing you poetry
of allowing words to
cascade across the keyboard and into existence
at your memory
I’m sick of finding the deepest meaning in
the scars you made
of feeling anger
or happiness
when I see your face
it’s twisted
you
are my melodramatic muse
the minor notes of a chord that make it sing
sweet pain through the heart
you
the sickly seductive lure of rotten fruit
of fermented brews bottled to celebrate or
commiserate or
forget
you
I could unlearn the English language
and still end up with too many words for you
I’m so sick of writing you poetry
but
thank you
for the inspiration
here’s your other sock too [poem]
it started with his bodywash sitting
innocently abandoned
in my shower one morning
I swung it by his place with a quick kiss and
a reminder to grab his things next time around
this is the way we love
two adult people
with separate lives and separate homes
choosing moments to be together
planned interactions
rather than the passive mingling of moments
this is our love
a love that doesn’t need a drawer in my dresser
to know he’s welcome in my home
a love who respects his own boundaries enough
to take time alone when he needs it and
I gladly let this love go
his time alone
a chance for me too
to breathe
because let’s face it
love is a heavy blanket in spring and
sometimes we need to leave it folded to the side
when the sun makes things too hot
other times we need the comfort of its cocoon
to offset the chill of an April storm
love is a balance
of hellos and
goodbyes and
here’s your other sock
too
half formed metaphors [poem]
I think I figured it out
the formula how to calculate the number of
beats per minute
my heart has to pump
to keep this borrowed body moving
it’s not just a pulse it needs
but food and shelter and
sleep
I’ve figured these things out
bit by bit
as the sound of your voice becomes
a strangely distant mumble
I don’t remember
the last words you said that day as
we stood in the same room
with a mountain of disillusions between us
your name
is treated like a touchy motion sensor
we whisper and pray that
it won’t set off my car alarm heart tonight
shit
all the crossed wires guarantee
I need an expert to take a look under the hood
to straighten things out
I always knew you were a blown fuse
and
this is how my mind functions now
a faulty computer full of poorly written code and
half formed metaphors
I married my best friend [poem]
when I say
I married my best friend
what I mean is
I married the woman who
saw the hurricane of my confusion
approaching her horizon
without warning
and she threw open her windows to let me in anyway
I married the woman who
let me vomit up my putrid self-hate at her feet
then handed me a glass of water
and some mouthwash
to help me forget about it and move on
I married the woman who
witnessed my obliteration and
let me ask for help when I was ready
in no rush to glue my pieces back together
before I figured out
which ones needed to be left behind
I married the woman who
understood what I meant when I said
I wanted to unravel my tangled mess of old dreams
until the thread could be used to
cross stitch a new life
of course
I married my best friend
who else could
love me so perfectly
daydream [poem]
lay your head down in my lap
my thighs
your pillows as
daydream shadows dance across
the inside of your eyelids
slowly
love
feel my fingers
carding through your hair
careless combing
a soothing tingle down your spine
you’re mine
in this moment
when the sun dances through the window
to trace bright stripes of
daylight
along the curve of your hip
and then you
smile
expired peanut butter [poem]
when our friendship ends
it is expired peanut butter
the jar of creamy goop tucked away in
some cabinet of your mind
the expiration date passing between
that day and the next
you keep going
believing
you and I have something to bind us
together
in a delicious sandwich
comfort food for the soul
but you’re wrong
and the jar grows dusty as time passes
until one day
you want a snack
a sweet taste of familiarity on the tongue
so you scoop up a spoonful
and lick it
something’s off
an unsatisfying texture coating everything
and it’s only then that your realize
our friendship expired
months ago
gross
you manage [poem]
you manage to love me
through the broken heartbeats
and the new beginnings
the rough edges
and the calloused hands
through my too-deep darkness
you manage to find me
when I’m so lost I sink into myself
consumed by self-pity
and self-doubt
and Self
and you bring me back
your love both compass and map
you manage to save me
even when I don’t want to be rescued
from that pit
you know the one
where shadows whisper sweet lies
and reality starts to fade away
painlessly
you manage to remind me
that I can keep breathing through the pain
that I’m not alone
that yesterday can go fuck itself
and that today is a free pass to start over
whenever I’m ready
razor blade [poem]
I knew what you were from the beginning
I could smell the blood on your skin
like a personal perfume
evidence of your heart’s nature
you were made to spill blood, boy
the way a razor blade is made
for cutting away the things you’ve deemed
excess and removable
a tidy separator of wanted
and unwanted
your love carves out life from flesh
with patient precision
until this new fool learns your timely lesson
you can never trust the hand
that holds the blade
without shaking
when you finally meet her [poem]
when you finally meet her
she’s sunrise steady
a guaranteed smile in greeting
a girlish giggle of happiness
and you
you are sunset inevitability
the bitter caffeinated coating
of coffee on the tongue
and together
together is explosive supernova
the continuation of a forever cycle in
two souls orbiting
becoming one heart
contained in two bodies
sharing one love
and faith
faith is earth’s tilted axis
a wibbly wobbly creator of seasons
and your shared secret promises
and hope
Larissa Lee 